I’ve often wondered how men fair amid the metropolises of Gulf malls. My female friends in Bahrain are shopaholics, as I probably would be too if I lived there , provided I could afford it.

They tell me there are two types of Bahraini man: Mr Shoptastic and Mr Shopaphobe. One example of the latter, and who tells his story with particular verve in his blog, is Ammaro.

Even Houdini Couldn’t Escape Bahrain Mall…

Ammaro gives a hilarious account of one Ramadan night post-ifta when, in dire need of clothing he finds himself in a compromising position: Can he get to his sneakers in time and bolt out of the door, or will he face, as he so eloquently puts it, yet another night of relentless ruthless shopping with his nearest and dearest.

“Honey?” She said.

“Dammit!” I thought, as I tried to slip my shoes on and make a run for it. “I need to go shopping today.”

His wife is usually content to trawl the malls with her family and close female friends but on this particular (dark) night, Ammaro finds himself the only accomplice to his wife’s “shopping fever.”

Comprehending Consumerism (A Philosophical Approach)

Beneath the dazzling lights of Bahrain mall on Gerga’on, Ammaro find the festivities have shifted to the shopping centre.  Bemused by larger than life Disney characters handing out balloons, he suddenly finds himself faced with a bigger, existential question.

“The thing I don’t understand is how a woman can spend so much time in one shop. Seriously, it’s not just my wife; the shopping mall was filled with women, and each one seemed to spend unreasonable amounts of time looking at every single piece of clothing in every single store. How can they keep up their interest for so long?”

Ladies, do you detect a light bulb illuminating some fundamental facts of life here?

Women can shop till we drop. It’s in our genes, our DNA, whatever you want to call it.

“In my case, after walking into a clothes store, I’m able to keep up my excitement for approximately, ermmm… 12 seconds…” Ammaro concludes.

I rest my case.

The Enlightened Male Shopper

Our Bahrain adventure capitalism guide raises a very interesting point: Why, when women’s clothes are smaller than men’s (and therefore presumably cost less to manufacture as they require half the material), do they cost twice the price?

“My belief is that it’s a conspiracy, with clothes companies not even bothering to create a separate clothes line for women; just using the same clothes the made for kids and labelling them “women” and then charging ridiculous prices for them.”

Interesting theory!

Solidarity for Shopaphobes

Though seemingly stranded, our Bahraini hero spots another of kind (MMM – Marooned Man in Mall). Locking eyes for a moment, the pair found a millisecond of mutual understanding

“It’s as if we were both telling each other, “hang in there, you’re going to make it”. Freedom is but a few hours away (it was about half an hour before all the shops closed), and then we can be free to run away to whichever gahwa our heart pleases and hang out with the guys.”

With the trunk of the car heavy and his wallet considerably lighter, Ammaro heads home and signs off.

Read his blog, be you Bahraini or not.  You’ll laugh out loud.

Seems like Lebanon’s got talent, beauty, style and pizzazz. I mean, I knew it had spawned onscreen siren Salma Hayek and sexy songstress Shakira, but I recently discovered three male icons that I never knew were Lebanese or had Lebanese blood. Ready for the revelations?

1.  Omar Sharif

Thought the sexiest cinema star of the sixties, seventies and eighties was Egyptian? So did I. Omar may have been born in Alexandria but his parents were full-blood Lebanese. Omar’s acting career kicked off with a bang in the Egyptian film, Sira`a Fi al-Wadi, (English, The Blazing Sun). He starred with his wife, Egyptian actress Faten Hamama, in several movies, although his decision to stay in Europe to develop an international profile eventually led to their divorce (while housewives the world over breathed a sigh of relief).

Sharif’s first English language film was Lawrence of Arabia in 1962, which earned this Lebanese man a Best Supporting Actor Oscar nomination, a Golden Globe Award for Best Supporting Actor – Motion Picture, a Most Promising Newcomer award and a reputation as the hottest Arabic actor on Earth. (My mum agrees!)

2.  Keanu Reeves

Another wild card: Believe it or not, Kay-ah-noo was born in Beirut, Lebanon! He is the son of Patricia Bond, an English costume designer/performer, and Samuel Nowlin Reeves, Jr., a geologist of Hawaiian, Chinese, Portuguese and English descent. Reeves’s mother was working in Beirut when she met his father.

Keanu was whisked around the world as a child. After his parents divorced in 1966, his mother became a costume designer and moved the family to Australia and then to New York City. The rest, as they say… is history.

3.  Frank Zappa

I kid you not, or at least it was music to my ears. The legendary (and sadly deceased) avant-garde composer, musician, Godfather of wah-wah guitar, Phoenix of psychedelia, record producer and man of movies was born to a half Lebanese father.

With a career that spanned almost 40 years, Zappa certainly covered the spectrum of the music industry. He produced almost all of the more than 60 albums he released with the band Mothers of Invention and as a solo artist.

If you’re a gossip addict (like me), it will have been hard to avoid the waitress scandal surrounding Indian golfing ace, Tiger Woods. Perhaps it’s best we just gloss over that… Moving swiftly on, and in the name of helping Indian men in the public eye to retain their reputation as faithful partners and husband, The India Times ran an interesting article on some of the country’s finest examples of “true gentlemen.” So ladies (and gentlemen), here is a quick pick of five of India’s most chivalrous stars:

Brains and Beauty in a Nutshell: Shah Rukh Khan

Actor Shah Rukh Khan isn’t just easy on the eye. He’s also one smart cookie. Owner of his own production house and IPL whiz kid, Shah Rukh is also famous for being the perfect family man. Married to wife Guari and also a loving father, looks like this on screen and off screen hero can do no wrong. It would seem his chemistry with a string of gorgeous actresses, including Kajol and Juhi Chawla, it would seem that it’s all for the camera!

Hitting the Home Run: Sachin Tendulkar

Cricketer Sachin Tendulkar  may break records but he doesn’t break hearts, or at least not his wife’s! Perceived to be a number one family man, the only rumour and speculation that wafts around about Sachin is whether or not he’s going to retire to spend more time with those he loves the most.

The Happily Married Minister: Omar Abdullah

Chief Minister of Jammu and Kashmir, Omar Abdullah is happily married to Payal Singh and a father of two sons, Zahir and Zamir. This handsome politician is no stranger to controversy but he handles it all with grace and dignity and at the end of the day, most folks, including plenty of Indian ladies, look up to and not down on him.

Elbow-Deep in Love: Arjun Rampal

You’ve heard of wearing your heart on your sleeve, but tattooing it on your forearms?  Actor Arjun Rampal is happily married to Mehr Jessia and has the names of his two lovely daughters Mahikaa and Myra set in ink on his arms. “It’s my way of having them with me every second of the day,” says Arjun Rampal in the India Times article.

Family Business: Kumar Mangalam Birla

Businessman Kumar Mangalam Birla has been named one of  India’s  top three Indian entrepreneurs, and has always had that “je ne sais quoi”. Successful in his career, and an excellent family man, Kumar means business in every sense of the word!

Who is your Indian male rolemodel? Do let us know!

Life can bite if you’re a pet-loving man in Riyadh. A law passed in the Saudi capital mid-2008 prohibited men from walking dogs or taking cats out and about in the city.

In fact, whilst existing pooches and moggies have to be kept indoors, the law also states that you can’t buy such animals anymore.

What’s Wrong With Rover?

According to a July ‘08 AP article, the justification given for the ban was that some Riyadh men were using their pets to get close to women and in some cases, harangue them.

Dogs and cats were being used to break the ice between guys and girls on the streets, something that’s an absolute no-no in Riyadh where the sexes are strictly separated.

Apparently, men caught pet-handed risk having their furry friends confiscated by Saudi religious police, AKA the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice.

Smell a Rat?

Speculation wafted around Riyadh that the ban might really be a guise to control pet ownership, seen as an external influence. Dog ownership has not been part of Saudi culture until relatively recently. Cats, though, have and are particularly highly regarded by some Muslims, as one of Prophet Muhammad’s closest companions was given the name Abu Huraira, Arabic for “the father of the kitten.”

Abu Huraira went everywhere carrying a kitten, and some traditional stories portray Muhammad encouraging people to treat cats well.

Pet-u-Lant?

Further rumblings on the issue came from the fact that a pet-shop owner in the city had never heard of the ban, and he wasn’t the only one…

The AP article also mentions that men don’t often walk dogs in Riyadh and even less walk cats.

What’s more, it’s unsure whether Saudi men and women are even really adhering to the ban. In 2004, cell phones with camera were banned in Saudi Arabia, as devices for photographing the opposite sex. The ban was swiftly lifted when the demand got too great for imported phones and a large contingent of Saudis blatantly ignored it and carried on snapping happily.

Are you a Saudi pet owner? What’s the score with the Pooch Prohibition? Please let us know!

I decided to read up on Qatari men as soon as I found out that there are 4 men to every one woman in Qatar. That’s pretty good odds really if one is looking to choose from an ample selection!

I found a great blog on Qatari men by Yousra Abdelaal, a keen-eyed lady who’s lived in Qatar for 6 years. Yousra sets out to hand all us lucky ladies the low-down on Qatari chaps and sift the wheat from the chaff on the rumours that Qatari men are unapproachable. Here are the highlights in a top five I’ve thrown together.

1.  SOFT CENTRED NOT SELF-CENTRED

At the end of the day, despite their perfect image, most Qatari men have all the same quarms and quandaries as the rest of us: When at home, Qatari men are totally relaxed and nothing like the pristine portrait they may present while outside!

2. FLASH BUT NOT FLUSH WHEN IT COMES TO CASH

While some Qatari men might be made of money, most actually have a modest income. A fair few actually struggle to make ends meet. The flash cars you see around Doha are often taken out on loans, and designer copies of clothing and accessories abound. The need to look perfect stems from a mentality of masculinity and prestige and Qatari men scrutinize each other as much as we girls do! (Kind of nice to know, right?).

3. GOTTA LOT ON THEIR PLATES

Qatari men are aware of the fact that one day they will get married and have to support their wives and children, and in many cases, their parents and siblings. They have to face high mahrs when they get married, plus wedding expenses, then further down the road it just gets even more expensive (house, car, servants, drivers etc).

Many Qatari men take out whopping great loans from the government and banks to pay for all these expenses and spend 15-20 years paying them off. They also have many family obligations: they are expected to look after their mothers’ and sisters’ needs as a mahram, providing for them financially, protecting them, and driving and escorting them to wherever their mothers and sisters want to go. When they get married, they have both their families’ obligations and then obligations to their wives. Sounds like a lot of responsibility…

4. HANGING OUT WIT DA BOYZ

What do Qatari men do in their spare time? Most of them go to the malls, meet friends at cafés, love the cinema. They spend their spare time chatting, watching TV, playing board games or video games, drinking coffee and eating snacks with their male buddies and relatives. Like many of us around the world, Qatari men love the Internet these days, spending hours chatting on Messenger and writing on forums.

5. SECRET ROMANTICS

Here’s the wild card. There are plenty of Qatari men who love the great outdoors and set up tents in the desert or on the coast. They take up traditional hobbies like archery, rifle shooting, falconry and horse riding. Lots of Qatari men are huge romantics and write beautiful poetry and free prose and play the Ood.

A big thanks to Yousra for enlightening us. Are you a Qatari man or are you married to one/dating one/friends with one – do let us know your thoughts!

It was a real revelation for me to discover the Palestinian women’s soccer team and the Jordanian female boxers that I blogged about recently. Equally fascinating is the bouquet of issues and questions thrown into the air by the very notion of Middle Eastern sportswomen in more traditional countries… where sport is still largely considered a man’s game.

A prime example is the 2009 controversy surrounding Alireza Mansourian, football academy director of Esteghlal, one of Iran’s biggest and most popular clubs,  Mansourian is a former Iranian soccer star-turned-coach at this Tehran-based club, which has attracted a huge following, although it is under the authority of Iran’s Islamic rulers.

Allegations were made in early ’09 that the club’s men and women players staged a battle-of-the-sexes match behind closed doors, in full breach of Iran’s gender segregation laws.

Kicking Over the Traces

Esteghal’s management denied the match took place, but nevertheless, the allegations prompted an internal inquiry, which led to a disciplinary hearing. As a result, three officials, including the women’s and youth team coaches were fined and suspended and Mansourian, once an Iranian sporting icon, found himself in seriously hot water.

The club issued a public apology but to little heed. Soon after, an investigation was opened by the state-run sports governing body that enforces separation of Iranian men and women in competitions and venues.

Iranian women (and men!) love soccer, but religious regulations state that female teams must play in closed spaces away from the gaze of men. Women are also barred from attending men’s football matches. A 2006 decision by Iranian president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, to allow women access was overturned after conservative clerics kicked up a fuss, claiming it went against Islamic values of feminine modesty and chastity.

The Official Story

Esteghal Club President Amir Vaez Ashtiani, who has called for tough action against the possible culprits in the alleged battle of the sexes match.

The Iranian press reported the match finished with a score of 7-0 to the men’s team at Esteghlal’s Marghoubkar stadium on Tuesday. Officials insist the two teams came into contact only briefly because their training sessions overlapped. Mansourian said the men’s team wandered on to the playing field 10 minutes before the end of the women’s session but were promptly ordered off by security staff.

“I was not present at the stadium but I heard that such an incident took place. However, on examination, I concluded that the incident did not happen in the way it is alleged,” he said in an article in The Guardian.

“Esteghlal football club is committed to moral values and will take action against wrongdoers according to the law. Action will be quickly taken against those involved and the culprits will be legally punished.”

I’ve always been fascinated by Turkish culture on many levels: the multi-faceted influences as East meets West that floods from Turkey’s 8 borders, the fusion of the traditional and the progressive mindsets that buzz within the nation.

I’ve been reading a lot about Turkish men lately, after stumbling across an article about Didim, where over the past couple of years, comparatively high numbers of Turkish men married British women.

I must say, I’m struggling to see the cultural similarities, (Nice cuppa PG and a chunk of Turkish delight?) but the statistics are clear as day, From January to October ’09 42 men from Didim married British women. Over the same period, one Turkish woman married a British man.

Cupid Clicks his Fingers?

Social networks and online dating have been cited as the principle ingredients for love that transcends land and sea.

Urban hubs such as Istanbul, where ADSL is evermore a household item and Internet cafes abound, seem natural fertile ground for Internet romance. What surprised me is that this rush of foreign attraction took place in the small  seaside resort of Didim. The answer? Tourism!

Small Town Love

Over the past decade, Brits have begun to buy holiday homes in Didim, establishing a visible community of many thousands, to the extent that utility bills in the district are now printed in English as well as Turkish. You can see the Union Jack and other British flags all around Didim, especially in the bars.

So Turkish man meets British woman, she goes home for the summer, and Bob’s your uncle – technology enables them to maintain contact until he pops the question.

Putting Marriage on the Map

Modern technology adds a foreign tint to ancient tradition in other parts of Turkey too, even in the most unlikely of places. The Yildirim Internet café in Gokce, a small village with a population of just 3200, near Turkey’s southern border with Syria has become the local lonely-hearts club.

Turkish men in the village pour into the café to surf for wives online and thanks to Turkey’s increased visibility in the middle east the potential Turkish husband has become quite a catch.

Turkey’s immigration laws enable Moroccan citizens to enter Turkey without a visa. In 2009, 10 Moroccan brides, including a 45-year-old who married a man 30 years her senior arrived in Gocke to get married. All were second wives, and more than a dozen more are expected to arrive in the coming year.

Are you a Turkish man married to a foreign woman? Or are a foreign woman married to a Turkish man? Feel free to enlighten us!

Rightly, or wrongly, more conservative Gulf countries like Kuwait are often highlighted in the international media for gender inequality. The situation is undoubtedly improving across the board, thanks to the internet, women’s groups and what appears to be a general mellowing of attitudes.

There are always two sides, if not three, four or five to every story. I was curious to investigate whether there were any jobs that men in the Middle East aren’t allowed to do and lo and behold….

Since January 2007, Kuwaiti, men have been prohibited from working in women’s lingerie stores.

Keeping it Under Wraps in Kuwait

In January ’07, Kuwait issued a decree Sunday banning men from working in shops selling “private” women’s garments like underwear. The decree, issued by the ministry of social affairs and labor, gave businesses three months to implement the ban and replace male staff with female workers or face a fine of up to $700 dollars for each male worker found behind the counter.

The administrative circular number 53/2006 was issued according to a ministerial decree number 165/2006 to ban men from working at shops selling item of intimate apparel.

Special inspectors from the ministry visited stores to enforce the ban (although it’s unclear whether these inspectors were male or female). The ministry also ordered its labour departments to stop recruiting male migrant labourers for employment in women’s lingerie shops.

Posing a Problem for Store Owners

I have to say, even as a very modern girl living in an ultra-modern world, I can see the sense in this – In the European lingerie stores I’ve visited, I think I’ve always been served by a woman and I don’t know how I’d feel buying my smalls from a guy (no offense boys.) After a quick poll of my Arab male friends, all told me they’d feel strange about selling female underwear, particularly the married ones.

Despite the ever-growing number of women working, it’s still more common to be attended by male shop staff in Kuwait, and the pressure to find a job remains much greater for men.

What’s more, a lingerie shop is considered a far cry from the ideal employment establishment for a Kuwaiti woman. Substituting male workers for female in this instance is challenging and shopkeepers have had difficulty complying with the law because it’s tough finding women willing to work in these stores.

The Lingerie Law Engulfs…

Kuwait and Saudi Arabia were the first countries to implement the law banning men from working in lingerie boutiques, followed a couple of months later in March 2007, by Sharjah in the UAE. During first month of the Sharjah campaign, 40 shops were found breaching the new lingerie law and 10 outlets were forced to shut down.

There are many advantages to being a girl, if you ask me, and one of them is make-up. Natural beauty is all very admirable, as far as I’m concerned, even Mother Nature needs a helping hand now and again, and besides, it’s fun!  Let’s get one thing quite clear, I don’t know too many girls who’d go on a date without at least a lick of mascara.

I’ve been intrigued by the emergence of men’s cosmetics on the market, and the reaction it’s caused. The El Corte Ingles department store in Barcelona, where I’m based has extended its range of male personal care items to include concealers, powders, and even eyeliner for gents.

I asked my male friends what they thought of man-kup and I can’t say the response was exactly… enthusiastic. However, there was a time back in the days of Ancient Egypt when make-up was unisex.

Making Up in Ancient Egypt

The Ancient Egyptians were an industrious lot. Not surprisingly, toiling in the sun all-day could wreak havoc on the skin, so men would apply oils and animal fats as UV protection. Employers would even include them in their workers’ pay packets!

These oils and fats were pretty versatile and were used as massage oils to sooth aching muscles after a hard day, and sometimes scented and moulded into tic lotions, to become moisturizers. Surprisingly enough, skin hydration became a widely accepted part of many Egyptian men’s daily health and beauty regime.

Pass the Kohl Darling?

It wasn’t uncommon for ancient Egyptian men to use eye make-up in King Tut’s times. An affluent Egyptian man would often apply kohl eyeliner before heading out to work or to a banquet or celebration.

Black became the new green in the New Kingdom after 2134 BC. Prior to that, Old Kingdom fashion statements involved emerald eye shadow for men and women, which was made of ground malachite.

Ancient Egyptian eye shadow was applied with a flattened and smoothed piece of wood or bone to sweep the powered mineral from the brow line to the base of the nose.

Keeping it Clean

Historians insist that Ancient Egyptians’ love of cosmetics wasn’t purely based on vanity. Men, women and children all adhered to strict personal hygiene regimes dictated by the climate, religion and social hierarchy.

Call me selfish, but times have changed and I don’t know if I’m ready to share my lipstick with a loved one!

I often ponder the question of marriage within and beyond our faith, especially for men. As many of you know, Muslim women can only marry Muslim men, while Muslim men can marry Christians and Jews (i.e. “People of The Book”) if they so choose.

Islam, like many other religions encourages marriage within the faith, and is a diverse and widespread religion. Of course there are stipulations within the faith designed to support commonality of faith. First and foremost, if a Muslim man marries a practising Jewish or Christian woman, the children should be brought up as Muslims as Islam follows the culture of the father.

The Road Less Travelled By

Of course, in reality, many dedicated Jewish or Christian women would want to raise their children in their own faith. This is especially true of the Jewish faith, which follows the culture of the mother.

Religion may not initially be a big problem between two people who fall in love, but can come to mean so much more when children are involved. It’s a tough one for a Muslim man who chooses to marry a Christian or a Jew as he has the pressure of ensuring the children will be Muslims.

Articles of Faith

There’s a brilliant site article on WSC’s Inside Islam called an Ideal Husband, which discusses three perspectives on this soul-searching matter. One is that of Asra Nomani, who wrote an article for Marie Clare entitled My Big Fat Muslim Wedding, which challenges Islam to change its rules and permit Muslim women to marry non-Muslim men. Nomani argues that Muslim women should be allowed to find love in whomever they choose regardless of their faith.

G. Willow Wilson responds - she’s converted to Islam and married a Muslim man and argues that troubled marriages are not specific to Muslim men; its just  Islam get the most negative attention on the matter. She believes that a common religion for married couples is something that all religious groups support.

The third perspective focuses on the Doha Debate on the sensitive issue of marriage outside of the faith. Yasir Qadhi raises the point that a person who identifies as Muslim, man or woman, must stay within the boundaries of the faith. For him, marriage is tied to self-identification. Qadhi also states that while he doesn’t agree that Muslim women should be allowed to marry just anyone, a degree reformation is needed within the Muslim community to alleviate the subjugation of women that occurs in many societies.

Together We Stand?

This three way debate raises as many questions as it does answers. I agree with Nomani that men and women should have the same rules and rights (I’m a child of the Seventies after all.) I also agree with G. Willow Wilson that common religion is the ideal basis for a marriage and Islam unfairly gets a bad name on this subject. I also concur with Qadhi that marriage and faith are tied to self-identification.

I set off in search of 3 more opinions…

I asked a Muslim male friend who is of marrying age what he thought on the matter, and he responded that he would consider it a great failure if his children weren’t brought up as Muslims. Perfectly understandable. I also broached the subject with a young Jewish woman I know and she told me that under Jewish law, her children would be Jewish “automatically”, regardless of whom she married and that the decision was God’s, not hers.

Finally I turned to two dear friends of mine who had an interfaith marriage in Switzerland in the 70’s and now have 3 wonderful daughters. He is a Moroccan Muslim, she is a Swiss Jew – while they both have faith, neither one is extremely devout. They told me that whilst their families had held strong opinions on the match, their love just surpassed everything and that they had brought their children up by teaching them about both faiths and celebrating all Jewish and Muslim holidays, but without pressurizing them one way or the other. They also confided that now their daughters are teenagers, the girls have become incredibly culturally aware but their cross-faith is provoking some profound existential questions, not to mention some issues at school with other pupils.

I guess it comes down to whether you feel love is stronger than faith, faith stronger than love, or whether indeed, the two can coexist. I’m not sure…

Are you part of an interfaith marriage? If so, what are your thoughts?